I am a writer and a Mommy. I am a devout Jew. These are the most important books I have read: The Tao te Ching by Lao Tzu, Stephen Mitchell translation. Spiritual Divorce by Debbie Ford. Living Inspired by Akiva Tatz. My kitchen would suggest I'm a closet carny, as would my love of Branson.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Todd Akin and my thoughts on Rape

Warning:  nothing to do with food. 

Warning: cold, heartless post on rape.

Last week my husband told me what Todd Akin said as he read the news on his iPad.  He was shocked as we all were.

I keep seeing people reacting to this and so finally I have decided to share my own thoughts.

In my imagination, the history of sex for women is mostly rape.  Women didn't even have the right to vote until 1920 so I'm pretty sure they didn't have the right to say when they wanted to have sex.  

As far as I can tell, women were essentially property of men in this country until that point.  In fact, I think that's pretty much still how it is in many ways.  Women often run the home, whether they work full time or not.  Women are responsible for bearing children, feeding their families, keeping their homes clean and neat and making sure schedules are followed.  I'm not making this up.  There are books about this.  

i.e, Persistent Inequalities: Women and World Development


Even divorce laws in some states make it pretty clear that women are not equal to men.  If you are a man you have to take care of your wife after you guys are divorced.

It doesn't matter if that woman is a Doctor, for example.  As her husband, you should be taking care of her which supports the idea that she is your property or at the very least that she can't take care of herself and/or shouldn't have to.

In general, men are stronger than women and can make them have sex whenever they want to.  And guess what, they do!

I'm pretty sure that throughout the history of time, most of the people conceived on this earth were done so through rape if you define rape as making a woman do it when she doesn't want to which I think is a very good definition.

So what does all that mean?  It means that Todd Akin is really, really, really stupid.  

I know.  That's not nice and it's not fair.  I don't even know him.  But to me this isn't a religious or political or emotional issue.  

Please tell me if I'm even saying something controversial here.  Does anyone think differently?  Other than the last 100 years in the US, don't you think that most women throughout history had sex because some man decided to rape them and I'm pretty sure that resulted in children a lot of the time.

How could Akin's understanding of the world be so different from mine?  He looks like a kind of small guy so maybe he never raped anyone but surely he has eyes in his head and lives in this world and realizes how sex works.

All I can say is that I know Missouri well and I think he is representing that state just fine.  

This state is home to one of my favorite places of all time: Branson - where you can practically throw your kid into a tank with a bull shark here: http://www.predatorworld.org/Home_Page.html - except they are "closed for renovations" at the moment but all of their animals are now here: http://bransonswildworld.com/ where I'm pretty sure your toddler can get eaten by something if you aren't careful.

Now that I have written my very heartless post I will say that I am sorry what Todd Akin said hurt so many people who were raped and feel that his comments are twisting the knife embedded in their shattered hearts.  

Please don't let someone so stupid hurt you.  

As a small woman I have always known that most people in this world can physically overpower me but I cultivate my spirit which no one can ever touch and no matter what happens, at my core I will forever remain whole.





1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I think Akin had the stupidity to express what many neocons believe. When he said "legitimate rape" he was referring to what you described, Amy. The husband's right to take what he wants when he wants it. The pitiful part was believing women have some secret power to prevent pregnancy under those circumstance or any others. The furor is that he broke the silence on the issue. Beware of the current right wing leadership. They'd roll things back to the 50s and before.