tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22062958369687762092024-02-28T02:15:52.727-08:00She EatsA blog about good food and bad food and the joy of eating - especially weird food.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger757125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-65218535110900366582023-10-03T08:29:00.004-07:002023-10-03T10:53:07.775-07:00Marriage<p>To my adult kids, not yet married:</p><p>When a person is young, they might not understand what makes a good life partner. If their parents never divorced, and treat each other well, they probably get it. </p><p>So, most of us don’t get it.</p><p>The most important part of a long, happy marriage is shared values but most young people don’t know what that means.</p><p>Young people know from lust. Attraction is essential in marriage but it’s not the same as lust. A big secret is that the most attractive person looks ugly once you don’t like them. Likewise, whomever you love, becomes beautiful to you.</p><p>Good or bad, long lasting marriages last only because of commitment. Even happy marriages without commitment end.</p><p>Here are my suggestions to my five kids about who to date as an adult.</p><p>First, date only for marriage. This is because everyone you have a relationship with impacts you. People become part of you. Dating for fun is a very strange thing to do that will only hurt you badly. Do other things just for fun. Date for marriage.</p><p>Attraction is kind of obvious so you can rule out people if you have no attraction to them.</p><p>Shared values. I don’t know what your values are and you might not either. Here are some ideas.</p><p>Honesty. If you can’t be honest, and I mean really honest, don’t bother getting in relationships. They will be fraught and end badly. Do not bother with people who are not honest. Not ever. </p><p>Kindness. Be kind. If someone is kind to you but not others, they are not kind. If your life is long, you will be glad you prioritized finding a kind person to partner with.</p><p>Lifestyle. Do you value possessions? Status? One day you will realize that this is an empty proposition and life will come crashing down. If you value stuff to a level where you make your decisions based on how to get and keep more things, you aren’t ready to be with someone else long term. </p><p>On the other hand, are you organized? Are you diligent? Are you stable? Are you cerebral or do you prefer not to think about things? Do you want to make the world better? Do you just want to get by? Do you care if you never have kids, own the place where you live? Do you want to have a big career or a job that pays the bills.</p><p>Do you want to travel? Spend lots of time in nature? Do you like to stay fit? Do you want adventure? Do you like the quiet? Do you like to talk?</p><p>Do you want to create?</p><p>I am shocked by how young people date without ever asking each other these kinds of questions and then they marry and divorce. </p><p>Finally, love is not a feeling that exists and happens to you or that you find. It is the work you do and the choices you make in the context of others. </p><p>Get to know people and find out what really matters about them. </p><p>Three non-negotiables for your life partner: admiration, respect and good communication.</p><p>These must be mutual and in abundance. First, be sure you respect and admire yourself and then make sure you are good at communicating. If you are wild about someone but feel they don’t admire you in some ways or they are sometimes disrespectful, they are not it.</p><p>Choosing a life partner is a choice you must make every day and you will not want to at times. That will be about you and not the person you tied your life to. It helps to remember that.</p><p>Good luck! You can do this!</p><p>I can’t wait to meet them.</p>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-86192172985641601302021-06-15T13:36:00.001-07:002021-06-15T13:36:57.320-07:00The Jewels in my Crown<p> <span> When I can’t sleep at night, when I don’t feel well, when I am scared or feeling alone; when I am thinking about not being here anymore, I just want my children to know how I feel about them. When I was a kid, I always dreamed of being a Mom. I also dreamed of being a brain surgeon too but I didn’t think practically about either of these things. I did not wonder why I wanted to be a Mom so much. It just felt like having kids would be the joy of my life. I wanted to have five kids. I was desperate to have two boys, then two girls and then a boy. Or maybe I’d hoped for three boys and then two girls. </span></p><p><span><span> Those dreams were long ago and they changed the moment I had my first child. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to have children when I got married at 28. There was no reason for this fear but I felt it terribly. My husband was in no hurry to have children and was reluctant to start trying right away but when we did try and did not get pregnant immediately, he too felt the fear of not being able to have kids and was more willing to try in earnest.</span><br /></span></p><p><span><span><span> Pregnancy was a shock to me. I had never thought much about my body before that transformation. We decided not to find out ahead of time if we were having a boy or a girl and instead painted the baby’s nursery in greens and yellows and bought baby clothes that would look great on either a boy or a girl. This was one of the greatest happinesses of my life. I knew I was having a boy. I don’t know why I felt so strongly that was the case, but I felt sure and I wanted a boy and still, the surprise at birth was an incredible joy. When you have a baby, you definitely do not care if it’s a boy or a girl so that is the best time to find out what you are having. No better time.</span><br /></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span> This baby was my first wish. I wanted to name him a “J” name but his Dad named him and his Dad was right to. I held this baby close to me all day and night. He cried to be put down, to be left alone! I stared at him and talked to him and he talked back way before a baby should talk. I loved him with all my heart and I told him nearly every day how proud of him I was. How much I liked him. He was a miracle to me. I love this man, because time has passed and he is a man now, with all my heart. He is good. He is a good man. He is thoughtful and intellectual and interesting and he is gentle and magical. I poured every ounce of myself into this man so that he would be a good man in this world. I dedicated him to Gd when he was born so that he would be a G-dly man in this world.</span><br /></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span> But I was surprised by “boy energy.” My sister had a baby first so we had two boys and it was a lot of moving around and making anything into a gun and jumping off furniture and yelling and yelling and yelling. So, next I wished for a girl.</span><br /></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span> When I got pregnant with my second child everything was different. This time we didn’t try so urgently for a pregnancy. This time I felt strong and healthy during my pregnancy. We found out as soon as we could what we were having and I was delighted to learn I would have a daughter. She guided me through an easy pregnancy and an even easier childbirth and when I held her in my arms I saw her look around and I have never been so in love before or since. She is my heart child. </span><br /></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> She walks around with my heart in her hand. When I am scared, I fill myself with my love and adoration for her and will myself to be brave for her. I watched her, in awe, from the time she was born. She is always ten steps ahead of me. At 6 months old, before she could walk, she was always ten steps ahead of me. My love for her is so fierce. I want to protect her and keep her safe but she is already flying, soaring out across the world. I can’t keep her safe or keep her close. She wants to go fly and she has these incredible wings that will take her anywhere. I have always known that this person could do anything she wished to do and I have always been in awe that I get to be her Mom. </span><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> I wished for another baby after these two, but many years passed. And then a miracle happened. I married a man with two daughters. I love these women (for many years have passed since then) as my own children, even though I did not give birth to them. When the oldest was born, I blessed her as the child of my childhood love and I wished her every blessing and I loved her.</span><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> The youngest of these women is like the brightest light. She has taught me about brilliance and strength and vulnerability. She is loving and tender and joyous and incredibly brave. She gives me the most healing hugs of all the kids. I am comforted by her warmth and caring and I have always felt that it would be a great pleasure to watch what she will do in life. </span><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> The oldest nestled into my heart in some special way that none of my other children have been able to do. She could scream her worst insults at me and I would only want to hug her. I always feel that she keeps her secrets well hidden from everyone but I love her desperately. She forgets nothing, which has sometimes been a terrible thing. She has an incredible amount of talent but she hasn’t yet claimed her own path in life. I wait patiently for her to deeply understand that her life is hers and hers alone. I will always want to be close to her and near her.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> My last wish finally came. When he heard I was pregnant, my oldest son felt three sisters was too many and demanded that this baby be a boy. I cried when I went to the ultrasound where I would learn whether or not I had a boy. What if I did not? What would I tell me son? I knew it didn’t matter and that another baby would disrupt our lives no matter what. Yet there was relief when I learned my last wish was to be a boy. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> It never felt like I was pregnant with a boy though. And I was not. My last wish is my child who pushes me the most to grow and change and learn and accept. She is a wonder. She is all energy and emotion and life. She knows who she is and she feels everything deeply. My last wish can’t see well and that’s how she was born so she never knew the difference for a while. She saw with her heart. She is quick to laugh and is hilarious.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> These are the five jewels in my crown. Each one is a priceless, irreplaceable gem and my love for each of these people is limitless and eternal. I would do anything to give each of these children happiness, safety, health, love, understanding and freedom. I will always want to be close to them, to be their home, to be the person they trust and come to for any help in life. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span><span> I only wish in this life to wear the crown that is being Ima to these five people. This is my happiness and sense of self. This my purpose. This is my greatest soul pleasure.</span> </span><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span><span> </span><br /></span></p>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-81785367397524297682020-10-06T08:17:00.008-07:002020-10-06T08:18:32.069-07:00Rape<p>These blog posts just keep getting heavier and heavier! I'm studying rape in criminal law and there are a few important "facts" missing from what we are learning.</p><p>The most important fact about rape is SHAME. </p><p>Why don't people report being raped? Why don't prosecutors like holding rapists accountable? Why don't judges like sentencing people and why do we have rape problems in the first place?</p><p>SHAME.</p><p>Rape often has to do with sexual misunderstanding and everyone involved becomes overwhelmed with a debilitating sense of shame.</p><p>A woman who is raped, through no fault of her own, will still feel mired in shame. Think about that.</p><p>If someone hurts you almost any other way, do you feel shame about it? Not usually.</p><p>Sexuality is a core aspect of our identities and sexual harm done to us harms us deeply at our core. We feel shame because our identity has been altered at the moment our sexuality was damaged, which rape always does.</p><p>So, anyone involved in a rape situation - meaning the police, attorneys, judges - we all feel something deeply about it. This impacts us to our core. Did the rapist mean it? Did they have reason to believe they had consent? Did they think it was ok for some reason? Did she do something to deserve this?</p><p>Our very core identities are at stake when we ask these questions. </p><p>Rape is a special crime.</p><p>Many people who experience rape have not said no. Or maybe they said no but then they stayed and didn't fight. If you don't believe what I'm saying look at this data:</p><p>20% of women have been raped. </p><p>3% of men report having raped someone.</p><p>Both of these statistics are probably wrong. I would estimate that almost all women experience rape or sexual assault in their lifetime. That's a bold statement to make, but it is true. Most women are touched in an unwanted sexual way by the time they reach 18. Furthermore, I promise you that a woman who has sex when she doesn't want to (i.e., with her husband or boyfriend) is experiencing rape. </p><p>3% of men did not do all the raping.</p><p>Why does this matter? It matters because rape is commonplace in our world and as attorneys studying criminal law, we need to understand what rape is on a deeper level. We need to know what consent is and why sex happens so often in the absence of consent.</p><p>Consider this. Can a prostitute consent to sex? I would argue no. I would argue that every time a man pays for sex, whether in the back room of strip club, in a "massage" place or with a regular sex worker - he is raping her. Payment for sex means that there can be no real consent because there is inherent coercion. These men are paying to rape these women. If you think my reasoning is faulty, consider this. How often would any of these women agree to sex with these men without payment? Never.</p><p>Therefore, they are consenting only due to the coercion of money offered, because their need for money is greater than their need for personal safety. Why would someone enter into this profession? With sex workers, the answer is usually that they were sexually assaulted (often at a young age) so their sexuality was damaged and they sometimes make sense of it by going on to get paid for future non-consensual sex.</p><p>Guys, if you pay for sex, you are paying to rape someone. That should be an easy rape law. If you pay for sex, you should be prosecuted for the crime of rape without exception.</p><p>So here are my guidelines for those who want to engage in sex with others.</p><p>1. Ask for consent for any sexuality you are going to engage in. Can I kiss you? Can I touch you here? Can I touch you here? Do you want to be touched like this? Do you want to have sex?</p><p>2. If there is any reservation on the part of the other party, stop.</p><p>3. No one can consent when they are drunk or on drugs. Don't go there.</p><p>4. People who are struggling with mental illness can't consent. Don't go there. If your partner is crying, don't have sex with them. If your partner seems to be struggling to function in any way, do not have sex with them.</p><p>5. If someone has given consent but they seem like they are unhappy, stop.</p><p>This isn't foolproof, but I'm trying to give context. </p><p>Rape is common among humans. Until very recent modern history, women weren't even considered people - we were property. If we were your property, rape was probably part of that. It's going to take a long time for both men and women to move away from that paradigm.</p><p>Don't shy away from discussing rape. So much good can come from open conversations between men and women about sex and consent. Have at it!</p>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-68490509987337715312020-08-21T19:07:00.008-07:002020-08-21T19:19:04.590-07:0012 StepIn March 2018 my life became totally out of control. It wasn't the first time I struggled and it wasn't the first time I went to a 12-step meeting. Living with violence that I blamed to some degree on alcohol brought me to Al-Anon years before I took my seat in a meeting in earnest, as it often goes.<br />
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Since 2018 I have attended various 12 step meetings - Al-Anon, COSA, SLAA, OA and variations on those. What I have come to believe is that humans need to learn how to live. We might come out with a lot of joy and the ability to connect and be social and love and attach but we don't make it far as children before we learn to cope with pain and fear in some seriously maladaptive ways. <br />
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I've been thinking about how to write about these hard things in my life for quite some time. There is a good reason all of these groups are anonymous. Every kind of person has serious problems. Doctors, religious leaders, psychiatrists - they too need a place to go when they finally admit to themselves that they are alcoholics or any other kind of addict. We all need somewhere safe to go where there are no professionals keeping tabs or moderating. A place where no one is going to judge you or interrupt you. A place where you really are safe and loved.<br />
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Then, as you work the program, which means going to meetings, talking to people about what's going on in your life, getting a sponsor (someone who will help you work through the 12 steps) and working the 12 steps, you start to find that you are living and life is good. What's powerful about these steps? What do they mean? Why do they restore a person to sanity and serenity and give us back our joy, connection and love?<br />
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I'll start by sharing what the 12 steps are. This is the way I explain them.<br />
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1. Powerlessness and unmanageability<br />
2. Something outside of me can restore me to sanity<br />
3. We turn our will over to that something outside of me<br />
4. Searching and fearless moral inventory of myself<br />
5. Admitted our wrongs to another person<br />
6. Become ready to let go of our character issues<br />
7. Ask to be rid of our character issues<br />
8. List all people we have harmed and get willing to make amends<br />
9. Make direct amends as long as it doesn't cause further harm to anyone<br />
10. Keep taking personal inventory every day and promptly admit when we are wrong and make amends<br />
11. Prayer/Meditation focused solely on knowing our place in this world and how to be healthy<br />
12. Practice these principles in every area of our lives - share our experience, strength and hope<br />
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There is so much to say about these 12 steps. They are actually written like this: <a href="https://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/smf-121_en.pdf">https://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/smf-121_en.pdf</a> <br />
<br /><b>1. Powerless and unmanageability</b> - this is where a person realizes what they can't change in their life that is really hurting them. It doesn't matter too much what that is. Anything that they don't like in their life but that they can't figure out how to change. That's when you accept that you are powerless over something. Grasping that is so huge. It is the first giant leap towards recovery. If you need help with this one, you are powerless over other people, all places and many things.<br />
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<b>2. Power greater than myself </b>- if you believe in Gd, maybe this is easier for you, but I didn't find that to be the case. When I hit recovery I thought Gd must hate my guts for what I was dealing with. Believing in a power greater than myself was easy, but that this power would restore me to anything was not plausible. I struggled hard with this step and I eventually had to abandon Gd in place of a mysterious higher power that I could trust and rely on - maybe some part of myself that could only be reached through meditation. Eventually, I realized that the group, my friends, my family - many others could be this power. The point here being that I could not ever, ever, ever restore myself. We need other people to help us through our tough situations. Which brings us to step three.<br />
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<b>3. Let go of self will </b>- this step talks about turning our will and our lives over to Gd as we understand Gd. But this step is about letting go of our self will. In other words, we have our own ways that we want things to go and when things don't go our way, we use a lot of strategies to get things to go our way. The cessation of this behavior is when life starts actually working for you. Step 3 is a very hard step for people. Probably the hardest step even though other steps are much scarier. Step 3 is all day every day and when you are doing it you know it because life becomes very, very easy. When you aren't doing it life is very hard. Practically speaking, get up in the morning and think about your day and what you plan to do. Now, every single moment when something gets in your way of whatever it is you want to be doing, just go with that instead. Someone cuts you off while you are driving? Slow down and let them go. That was meant for you. You spill something on your shirt just before leaving for work? Go change your shirt - you were meant to wear something different. This might sound frustrating, just imagining going with every obstacle, every person, every little thing that happens that you wanted to happen a different way - but this is the most powerful step. Once you get the hang of <b>letting the will outside of you guide your day</b>, your days get really, really easy.<br />
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<b>4. Searching and fearless moral inventory of myself </b>- step one is when we tell our story - what are the themes of powerlessness and unmanageability in my life? In step 4, we look at the things we have done that we really don't like. Steps 4 and 5 are done fairly simultaneously because as we recall all the things in our life we are not proud of...<br />
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<b>5. Admitted our wrongs to another person </b>- we tell another person exactly what we did - especially those things we planned to take to our grave. What we never dreamed we would ever tell anyone, we admit to ourselves and to another person. This was a very scary step for me to take but it gave me so much freedom. The fact is, we each think our deepest darkest secrets are the worst - worse than anyone could imagine - and yet we find out that we are human like everyone else.<br />
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<b>6. Become ready to let go of our character issues </b>- we need a lot of help from others to even admit what our issues are. Aggression? That's not a character defect! I like that about myself! Why would I want to be less aggressive. But, come to think of it, a lot of the bad things I did - things I'm ashamed of - came straight out of me being aggressive. Ok, I'm ready to let it go. <br />
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<b>7. Ask to let it go </b>- I don't know how to explain this one without an actual higher power so someone else can probably do a better job of explaining this step than I can. For me, I had to meditate and pray for a week or two on each character defect that I was ready to give up. This step never ends. Most steps never end. There is no place for perfection when it comes to working these steps. If one could finish a step forever then there would be no step 10. One thing I recently learned about this step is to plan specific actions to make the changes I want to experience in my life and commit to doing them every day. <div><br /></div><div>8. <b>Make a list - </b>when I first tried to do this step I was overwhelmed with shame and self-loathing. I had to try to remember every person I ever interacted with, right? No. I have to make a list of people I feel I need to make amends to. The list should not be a method by which you beat yourself. Just be honest about people in your life and in your past you know you should apologize to. If it helps, focus on big things. Hint: You are number one on this list.</div><div><br /></div><div>9. <b>Make amends - </b>a few things about making amends, you will find out quickly how easy it is to hurt someone when making amends. Bringing up past hurt is hurtful. I think the most important piece of step 9 is to deeply and sincerely make amends to yourself. How have I not taken care of myself in life? How have I let myself down? What ways did I really hurt myself? How can I try my best not to do it again and apologize and love myself better? For others, ask them if they would want to talk to you about ways you hurt them. Give them a chance to tell you what you did and be ready to be humbled and to hear them and really try to change. Don't go telling people you are sorry for your list of things - that's just more selfishness.</div><div><br /></div><div>10. <b>Daily inventory </b>- do step 4 through 9 every day</div><div><br /></div><div>11. <b>Prayer and meditation - </b>this step is hard to understand until you are on it because it says to pray only for knowledge of His will for you and
the power to carry that out. Most people pray for a lot of things. I know I still do, but deep down I know that there is only one prayer worth my time - G-d, please give me knowledge of your will for me and the power to carry that out. In other words, what am I supposed to be doing - in every moment of my life.</div><div><br /></div><div>12. <b>Service - </b>this step is written in a really funny way - "having had a spiritual awakening, <span style="color: #222222; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs" but this step is service and the most important thing you need to know about it is that you do it the first time you go to a meeting. Your very first meeting. Showing up to a 12 step meeting is some of the most important service you will do. There is more obvious service, like holding a position of responsibility in the group, being a sponsor, taking program calls and the list goes on. But being "in the room," as it is called, means that you are opening your heart and ears to others. It is the most powerful 12th step behavior you will do and it's the first thing you do!</span></span></div><div>
<br />There is a kind of magical interconnectedness between the steps that you don't understand until you get through them. Simply put, you can always work a step with a "1" in it. No need to do those steps in order. Step 1, 2 and 3 will become your daily moment-by-moment healthy living guide in terms of getting out of your own way. Steps 10, 11 and 12 will also be your daily practice of staying on track as a healthy person. 4 through 9 are the hard work you do to change. And you work them every day when you get to step 10. Every time you struggle with any step, just head to the one before and you will get back on track.</div><div><br /></div><div>I hope this helps someone someday...<br />
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<br /></div>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-67140519776252364352019-05-24T09:23:00.000-07:002019-05-24T12:13:44.847-07:00John’s Cactus Cocktail<div class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; color: #454545; font-family: ".SF UI Display"; font-size: 21px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">Equal parts tequila and orange juice </span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">Teaspoon prickly pear syrup (or more)</span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">Dash chambord </span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">Shake until blended </span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">Pour over ice</span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">One of the fun things to do as an adult is have fancy drinks. I judge a place by its cocktails almost as much as by their quality of food and the pleasantness of their bathrooms.</span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">There is a great restaurant in the woods up the mountain from my house called The Mountain House where you can get interesting drinks with your dinner. This is where my Dad got into prickly pears.</span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">So on Tuesday after breakfast at the Cove we borrowed some tongs and a takeout bag and my Dad picked some prickly pears.</span></div>
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There is a great recipe for making prickly pear syrup and we used it with ease and great success. Thank you Hank Shaw <a href="https://honest-food.net/how-to-make-prickly-pear-syrup/">https://honest-food.net/how-to-make-prickly-pear-syrup/</a></div>
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I recommend a few things. Burn the outside of your prickly pears.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmYcRBtoITq8pqgDvJZROSeJ1_87npOts6oH5GbHlE8do5loBRs2yypdJF2LwiWZbnNLbS4ZUTyI1nmOL44EhrhyphenhyphenO9B2P557CIrCs7AQry20pjIVSwi7fo2tw_Cy__4IsICRdYvPIL0w/s1600/4D4B620F-9A2E-4D18-B226-6FDCFCEA5E52.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmYcRBtoITq8pqgDvJZROSeJ1_87npOts6oH5GbHlE8do5loBRs2yypdJF2LwiWZbnNLbS4ZUTyI1nmOL44EhrhyphenhyphenO9B2P557CIrCs7AQry20pjIVSwi7fo2tw_Cy__4IsICRdYvPIL0w/s320/4D4B620F-9A2E-4D18-B226-6FDCFCEA5E52.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div>
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This gets those hairs off of them. The hairs really hurt and you don’t have to do so much straining once you get rid of them. Burn the outside of your prickly pears. Done.</div>
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Put them in a pot with water to cover them and bring to a boil. Once boiling turn off heat and let them sit for 30 minutes.</div>
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Then push through a device like this (used to make gnocchi).</div>
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Now you only need to put this through a very fine strainer twice. I don’t have pictures of that step but I used the kind of very find metal strainer that is used in Asian cooking and just poured the above mess through that and then one more time through it again - not pushing anything through it. </div>
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We started with 1 pound of prickly pears and ended up with about 6 or 7 ounces of prickly pear juice. </div>
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The key at this point is to weigh the liquid you have and then add the exact same amount of sugar. </div>
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Then bring the sugar and juice to a boil and simmer for 5 minutes. Don’t boil for 5 minutes or you will have prickly pear candy. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIlcghTw8qMnejvJvpXycPNsu0l_A3qKu9tHoneU8hGJX6J0vzV845C5pMlw16yua_WF_MuYwhMb2JQuvFLnrpH3ENeO_aDQw3QbIYKOeZhFzEWPt9JxjZBfJZ9ORXPp-2mSh1gQFB5g/s1600/2947B8DD-330E-47CD-A042-05DE1E81C1E3.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIlcghTw8qMnejvJvpXycPNsu0l_A3qKu9tHoneU8hGJX6J0vzV845C5pMlw16yua_WF_MuYwhMb2JQuvFLnrpH3ENeO_aDQw3QbIYKOeZhFzEWPt9JxjZBfJZ9ORXPp-2mSh1gQFB5g/s320/2947B8DD-330E-47CD-A042-05DE1E81C1E3.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div>
Once you simmer your sugar and prickly pear you will have a syrup. Now you have to add citric acid to taste. We used 1/4 tsp and it tasted delicious. Add a very little bit at a time, stir well and taste. And you are done!<br />
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The drink on the left is the recipe my Dad invented and frankly I’m not a fan. The drink on the right is for you tequila lovers. It’s tequila and prickly pear syrup. It’s hard to see but the syrup mixed only with tequila is hot pink. It’s so beautiful! The taste is amazing. I like Casadores Reposado - just about my favorite sipping tequila. I mix it about one to one ratio with the prickly pear syrup. </div>
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Enjoy!</div>
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Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-42410099105778941152019-05-09T09:53:00.001-07:002019-05-09T09:53:38.456-07:00Scallion PancakesWhen you go get Chinese food, if you can get scallion pancakes you probably should. They are delicious! Recently I discovered they are incredibly easy to make from scratch as well. But I have a hang up about making things from scratch apparently. So this morning I decided to try an experiment and it worked perfectly.<br />
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Some people can get pizza dough in their supermarket and if you are one of those people I’d count you as very lucky. I am one of those people and I take advantage of this just about every week because who doesn’t love pizza? I have been told by my kids that my pizza is the best in the world and they even named it <i>Ima’s Famous Pizza</i>. </div>
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This morning I discovered that you can make scallion pancakes with pizza dough,</div>
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The best part of this recipe is that you don’t have to measure shit.</div>
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Every good cook knows that measuring is not part of cooking when you are a good cook. I’m not talking about baking and of course I do still measure things sometimes but this recipe is especially fun because if you make scallion pancakes from scratch you have to measure the ingredients for the dough exactly. Not going to work if you don’t. And not the case with this recipe.</div>
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Step 1: Take a piece of the dough and roll it out. About an 8 inch flat circle is good but it can be smaller than that.</div>
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Step 2: This is the only step that can destroy your entire effort so you have to be careful on this one. You want to boil about 1 cup of water - in a pot or a pan. You are going to parboil your dough. Be very careful with this step. Have tongs ready. Drop your dough in rapidly boiling water - it must be rapidly boiling - and pull it out after just a few seconds. I throw mine down on my granite counter top because it cools off very quickly so I can start flattening it. </div>
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Step 3: Brush your flat round of dough with sesame oil and sprinkle all over with chopped scallions/green onions.</div>
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Step 4: Roll it up as tight as you can. Like a jelly roll and then make a spiral with that rolled dough and flatten it. Repeat Step 3 and this step. <br />
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If you can and want to you can do step 3 and 4 a few times - when you make scallion pancakes from scratch you will do this 4 times. But that's because your dough is very different. It's fun to make them from scratch and you can find lots of recipes for how to do that. Instead of pizza dough you need flour and boiling water and 30 minutes for your dough to rise/set or whatever. That's the big advantage of this recipe - you can make it in 10 minutes or less.</div>
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Step 5: Heat canola oil in a skillet and plop your big mess on to it. Did I mention this is a big mess? I forgot. When you make these - no matter what recipe you use - it’s a big mess. That’s ok. Just be prepared for that part of the rolling up your pancake and smashing it flat again - it’s going to be oil everywhere and scallions everywhere. Once you drop it in the pan, use a spatula to flatten it. If your dough is sticky (you did something wrong) just wait 30 seconds and then flip it and smash it. Your pancake is going to be made flat during this step and not before. Flatten away once it’s cooking. It cooks fast - just a couple of minutes on each side.</div>
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It will look like this, or even darker if you like, when it's done. There are a lot of options for the dipping sauce. I like a simple one - 1 part soy sauce 1 part white rice vinegar and some spicy chili oil to taste. I've seen a lot of interesting variations on this sauce and you can dip this in whatever you want or eat it plain. </div>
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If you were paying close attention you noticed that I did this experiment in the morning so guess what I did with my scallion pancake?</div>
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Breakfast scallion pancake!! Egg yolk is always a good thing to dip other things in...</div>
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Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-51138039908645661012019-04-16T10:09:00.000-07:002019-04-16T10:11:55.507-07:00Will Work for Apples<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This book is full of hilarious essays about teaching, including one by me about my time in Japan. I have enough humor stories from teaching on Amami to write a book and maybe I will. For now, please buy this one! <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1944123148/ref=dbs_a_def_awm_hsch_vapi_taft_p1_i0">https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1944123148/ref=dbs_a_def_awm_hsch_vapi_taft_p1_i0</a><br />
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Thank you.Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-33355581487960701802019-02-17T11:56:00.002-08:002019-02-17T11:56:50.186-08:00History has its eyes on you.Friday night we went to see Hamilton in San Francisco. I can't tell you the excitement I felt when I sat down in the beautiful Orpheum Theater realizing we had incredible seats in the middle, close enough to the stage to really see the show and that it was a different cast than the last time we saw the show. I looked around at the beautiful room and thought about it being packed and what would happen if...<br />
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I'm a little bit claustrophobic. I don't like crowds. But this crowd was calm and we all settled in for a wonderful show. As the singing started we all cheered in unison and delighted in the incredible music; the emotion took us away from our lives and transported us.<br />
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It was better than the last time I saw Hamilton. It was more emotional for me and at the same time I was more present in my own life so more present for the show. I felt raw watching the ending scenes and was looking forward to some quiet, getting home and having time for introspection and healing from the pain that these songs brought up - just the pain of being human.<br />
<br />
All of that changed as Eliza sang the last song of the night. Someone in the audience screamed. At first it sounded like a disgruntled child who was fighting with an adult, someone in need of being escorted quickly from the show as not to ruin it for everyone else. But the screams continued and sounded like terror. I looked back and saw people leaving the theater. I thought, "Someone must have had a heart attack. Some medical emergency. They must have frightened someone near them. Things will settle down now."<br />
<br />
I turned back to watch the performers finish the show.<br />
<br />
But something went wrong.<br />
<br />
The screams continued and now some kind of alarm was going or lights were flashing. People in the theater began screaming. Part of me knew that this was a misunderstanding. Part of me was sure that the event had spooked the crowd and that nothing was really wrong. My husband was panicked. He alternatively yelled at me to move, go or get down on the ground. He'd heard the word <i>gun. </i>The acting ensemble finally stopped ignoring the audience and were gone from the stage.<br />
<br />
I kept saying, "Calm down. Calm down." I refused to move and join the stampede and chaos. I calmly picked up my purse and prepared to exit the theater. Finally, we started towards the nearest exit. The theater had emptied considerably. There were coats, scarves, purses, phones, cups everywhere. There were people on the ground, starting to get up. People were still pushing to get out.<br />
<br />
One man yelled out, "Everyone calm down. Everything is ok. It's ok." And just like that, everyone calmed down. Everyone stopped pushing, screaming, running. We made our way outside just in case. Just because. I saw someone's black, high-heeled shoe lying in the stairway. <br />
<br />
People were shaking, crying, hugging each other. People were laughing with relief. None of us knew what was going on. There were sirens now everywhere. Police everywhere. But no one yelled at us. No one told us where to go, told us what to do next. Ambulances were there helping people who were hurt in the stampede and the person, or people who had medical emergencies. <br />
<br />
We went back into the theater to find our friends. Everyone was moving carefully and slowly, gathering belongings, helping each other. We were all shaking. Then we went home, grateful to be safe.<br />
<br />
It was sad. My overwhelming emotion was despondence. How have we arrived at this?<br />
<br />
We all live with so much terror of active shooters coming into the room, any room, anywhere and picking us off for no reason. Even with security in place as we walked in suggesting that no one in the building could even have the kind of weapon needed to hurt us. The fear and mass panic that so easily sent a theater full of musical arts patrons into hysteria is something we live with now. <br />
<br />
How will I go to another show like this? How will I be able to be in a crowd? I think of the courage of that man who was willing to calm the crowd. How did he know what he was saying was true? Should I have yelled something similar when the panic started? I was fairly sure that it was all just a misunderstanding right at the start - but what if I had been wrong?<br />
<br />
I want to wrap my arms around my fellow humans and say, "Calm down. Calm down." But, it seems like it would be wrong to say that because someone might end up getting hurt.<br />
<br />
<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-21279163727474737452019-02-06T10:10:00.001-08:002019-02-06T10:10:05.008-08:00Virtual RealityI went to the Oculus Connect 5 conference, which exceeded any expectations because loving my Rift virtual reality and Go vr experiences could not have prepared me for sitting in a room with Mark Zuckerberg and hearing Michael Abrash’s predictions for the future and just hearing anything John Carmack has to say.<br />
<br />
The future of reality is coming very fast and it’s clear to me that most of us are not aware of what’s coming.<br />
<br />
Think of the device we all carry around and worship, that didn’t exist a little over ten years ago. Some companies are still not fully grasping that this is where people want to do everything. The pc is falling by the wayside because people want to compute on their phone. That’s why phones are getting bigger; tablets continue to be popular but the personal computer is becoming less relevant and the limitations of the phone have nearly been reached.<br />
<br />
Next stop - mixed reality.<br />
<br />
It’s really hard to market virtual reality and augmented reality maybe even more so. But these two technologies are the path to where we are headed.<br />
<br />
I’ll give Google props for seeing this and building this way before anyone was ready for it with Google Glass. <br />
<br />
And Oculus is a miracle. Magic Leap is a miracle but both of these systems require you to strap stuff to your head and your body and like Google Glass, there is resistance to covering your eyes up and leaving your actual reality to be somewhere else or adding to your reality in a way that others can’t perceive.<br />
<br />
It’s intrusive. We need time to get used to it. The handheld computer we are all addicted to has helped us both get accustomed to our own personal world and to realize the danger in it. Apple got it and they prioritized the rollout of new screen time controls so we can limit ourselves by becoming aware of our behaviors.<br />
<br />
There isn’t a lot of danger that people are going to completely isolate inside of a virtual world or walk around with a headset that shows them things no one else sees.<br />
<br />
Nope, what’s next is mixed reality - that we share. Oculus deeply understands this. That’s where Facebook comes in. That’s how the concept of connection stays front and center and social vr is the mission and focus.<br />
<br />
One day we will all wear ultra lightweight googles that block our vision but also show us our field of vision, only altered to be the way we want to see it. And we’ll be able to show anyone what we are seeing. For example, we’ll be able to fly up in the air to see a traffic accident a mile ahead while we are stopped in traffic because we will be able to tap into what everyone else can see. We’ll also be able to interact with the virtual world we see with haptic gloves that we wear. Maybe that will involve nano-technology, a cream we smear all over our hands, and even all over our body, with microscopic technology built only to detect our movements and provide us with haptic feedback from the virtual world we are in.<br />
<br />
That’s stop number one. Then we will start to evolve as people and really integrate technology into our brains and bodies. Why would we want to have to wear something that gives us super powers when we could have it implanted directly in our brains. I like to think about the future with all it’s possibilities. <br />
<br />
Humans have known since ancient times that reality is not fixed. Perception is flexible and varies from person to person. The language and culture a person grows up in can determine whether they see something in nature as red or orange, blue or green. Reality and perception or not fixed.<br />
<br />
The natural evolution of human technology is to master and control our reality and make it the best version of what it can be. And share this with each other.<br />
<br />
I look forward to the day I can swim with whale sharks any time I want from the comfort of my own home.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-56815818922883817452019-02-05T20:57:00.000-08:002019-02-06T10:01:29.731-08:00Garbage Bread Where Have You Been All My Life?Why have I never heard of garbage bread or coconut crabs? I am 45 and I like the fact that I usually know about things existing in the world. Excluding apps and other technologies. I’m good with asking my teen to explain various social platforms to me but I’m shocked to learn there are <a href="https://www.thoughtco.com/giant-coconut-crab-3299293" target="_blank">giant crabs</a> living on planet earth that I didn’t know about.<br />
<br />
And garbage bread. It’s not what it sounds like. Really it’s something so natural I can’t comprehend how I never encountered it before finding it in the food section on Apple news a few weeks ago.<br />
<br />
What I do a lot of the time is make pizza. I buy pizza dough from the local shop and make “Ima’s Famous Pizza.” Sometimes I make calzones which are really delectable.<br />
<br />
So I am still baffled at how I missed making garbage bread!<br />
<br />
It can be described as simply as rolling up a cheeseburger. I find it incredibly fun to make and fun to serve and delicious. I’ve already made a couple of versions.<br />
<br />
Roll out pizza dough into a long thin rectangle.<br />
Cover with browned ground beef and lots of toppings.<br />
For example: american cheese, finely chopped red onion, chopped or sliced pickles, ketchup and mustard.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilIGJxcMQXRgXbhGm2hx6R5W0XN6-6O1wcahSm1-T6dttMrRUGZwEHNHukUpRXVVaGE4kOEG6dTdhqz86kDRxe01UT4EMyQ4mbRiFkj-9EmbCtz3zxUN95szAWZSCW7njb5EFiGEhV3A/s1600/37640FF8-5373-49DB-8507-FBD067872449.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilIGJxcMQXRgXbhGm2hx6R5W0XN6-6O1wcahSm1-T6dttMrRUGZwEHNHukUpRXVVaGE4kOEG6dTdhqz86kDRxe01UT4EMyQ4mbRiFkj-9EmbCtz3zxUN95szAWZSCW7njb5EFiGEhV3A/s320/37640FF8-5373-49DB-8507-FBD067872449.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjan282XPlK2X53NmRS7logDa0zZWJVkc8I5k0P0qlZRlxnpnBvWklgGQZkNiqwmMV5h9VffoV61NMKuoMlYfMB7iZfjdfiXMq4ERtrRUHCPUFYwhcuwomu_Vjv3yi4u1weGe4AChM0zw/s1600/11A838D1-82E2-4700-A3F9-7A03C5B3C7D3.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjan282XPlK2X53NmRS7logDa0zZWJVkc8I5k0P0qlZRlxnpnBvWklgGQZkNiqwmMV5h9VffoV61NMKuoMlYfMB7iZfjdfiXMq4ERtrRUHCPUFYwhcuwomu_Vjv3yi4u1weGe4AChM0zw/s320/11A838D1-82E2-4700-A3F9-7A03C5B3C7D3.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div>
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I also made this with my Mom’s famous sauce and her meatballs and a lot of mozzarella. There is no better meatball sub on this planet.</div>
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Look, I’m not going to move on from this. Soon I will host a garbage bread tea - maybe even on Shabbat this week. I don’t know. I’m not sure. But I hope others will get excited about making their own variations. </div>
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This is the all-in-one dinner we have all been waiting for.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEithdtxciK1ANxv7MIPRAkPL6N0_B2obniKRPN8yayYFq-Mf-jrwiKj7lV7hVWH8qwgduHmvOlt0YyRsMsM2Qj1ZnVcOOnS7Bt3aT_9kA4dZSAFwD4WlRJhfHUbjQflW0iFHleFrsRE9Q/s1600/EA9CA4D7-D28D-4FAB-8D42-21663C00D894.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEithdtxciK1ANxv7MIPRAkPL6N0_B2obniKRPN8yayYFq-Mf-jrwiKj7lV7hVWH8qwgduHmvOlt0YyRsMsM2Qj1ZnVcOOnS7Bt3aT_9kA4dZSAFwD4WlRJhfHUbjQflW0iFHleFrsRE9Q/s320/EA9CA4D7-D28D-4FAB-8D42-21663C00D894.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-57054502106873099922019-01-30T10:39:00.000-08:002019-01-30T10:39:15.307-08:00Dreams I used to love to dream. Now I know when I am doing better because I wake up feeling ok or I have good dreams. For several years now and certainly for the past ten months I have more nightmares than my share.<br />
<br />
Dreaming used to be one of my biggest pleasures in life and that’s why I am so keen on this song.<br />
<br />
Trampoline<br />
<div jsname="U8S5sf">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">I've been havin' dreams</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Jumpin' on a trampoline</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Flippin' in the air</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I never land, just float there</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">As I'm looking up</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Suddenly the sky erupts</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Flames alight the trees</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Spread to fallin' leaves</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Now they're right upon me</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">Wait if I'm on fire</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">How am I so deep in love?</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I dream of dying</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I never feel so loved</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">I've been having dreams</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Splashin' in a summer stream</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Trip and I fall in</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I wanted it to happen</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">My body turns to ice</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Crushin' weight of paradise</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Solid block of gold</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Lying in the cold</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I feel right at home</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">Wait if I'm on fire</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">How am I so deep in love?</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I dream of dying</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I never feel so loved</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">Wait if I'm on fire</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">How am I so deep in love?</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I dream of dying</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I never feel so loved</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">I never feel so loved</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">Wait if I'm on fire</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">How am I so deep in love?</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I dream of dying</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I never feel so loved</span></div>
<div class="UH8R2" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-top: 16px;">
<span jsname="YS01Ge">Wait if I'm on fire</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">How am I so deep in love?</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I dream of dying</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I never feel so loved</span></div>
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Songwriters: Spencer Ernst / Max Ernst / Chelsea Lee</div>
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Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-50539487537058482372018-05-20T19:36:00.002-07:002018-05-20T19:36:46.398-07:00Coming back slowly<div style="color: #454545; font-family: ".SF UI Display"; font-size: 21px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
<span style="font-family: ".SFUIDisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">It is not depression that I deal with today. As I start to come out of the shock and loss that I experienced in March, a loss that crushed my soul and extinguished my spirit and left me heartbroken, I come to believe that I can be whole again. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: ".SFUIDisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">There is possibly nothing as shattering as when you believe you are close to someone and then you learn that they have lied to you, every day, about things that are a matter of life and death. When someone you love and trust is living a secret life of betrayal, once you learn that your reality is false, your sense of self and your identity crumbles. This is not depression. This is blunt-force trauma. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: ".SFUIDisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">And these are things you can’t discuss with most of your friends. It would be too painful. So I’m finding some courage to start to write and let go of a little pain, knowing I’m not alone. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: ".SFUIDisplay"; font-size: 21pt;">Knowing that the people who care about me, who I can trust and who genuinely wish me well, lift me up with their loving thoughts. </span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-49081541002307501802018-04-26T10:30:00.000-07:002018-04-27T11:35:57.099-07:00PainI am living right now through the most difficult situation I have faced in my life. And I know others suffer more.<br />
<br />
I don't know why I feel the need to compare my pain with other people. A long time ago I liked to write and I wrote all the time. I liked to write stories and I even tried to write a few different novels. I used to like to write about what I cooked and take pictures and videos and share them.<br />
<br />
It was fun for me to do that even if I never knew if anyone was watching or listening. I'm reading a book right now that puts it all in perspective. It's reminding me that each of us just lives in our own movie and nothing can make that different. Hard as we try, we can't see ourselves the way others see us or see others the way they see themselves. We are never going to be able to do that and so we can only focus on what we see, what we dream, what we imagine and what we want to be to ourselves.<br />
<br />
This is difficult to understand because your whole life you are taught to think of how other people see you in implicit and explicit ways. You are taught to care about how you dress and wear your hair and how you stand and what you say and when you say it and on and on. Honestly, I have always found this hilarious. I mean, I know that it's true to some extent. In other words, I know for a fact that if you wear expensive clothes and shoes and wear your hair and makeup a certain way you can get hired at a certain level and that's fine and it makes sense. I understand that you can learn to be very good at manipulating other people with your words and your demeanor. Great. <br />
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At the end of the day, you will never in your entire life know what other people think of you. You will know only what you think of yourself and of others. I think this is my superpower. I genuinely love people but I know that I can't control what other people think and I generally don't worry too much about what other people are thinking.<br />
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Back to pain. <br />
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I'd say I have struggled with depression on and off my entire adult life. I don't have a lot of tolerance for it. I've taken medication to stop it at times. I've found that taking medication to stop depression can lead to much bigger problems. I've made really huge life decisions while taking medication that makes me feel "normal" and "happy" - decisions that haven't worked out well for me.<br />
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I remember during one stretch of depression that was extremely severe I had an epiphany about it that has helped me cope ever since. My Mom and I went on vacation together and she basically dragged me around making me do things I used to seek out and love to do and I felt a little better. I really took note of that.<br />
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The thing about depression is that you are not yourself. You are stuck in a kind of fog or quicksand where you can't see anything past your gloom and misery. Whatever you loved to do doesn't sound good anymore. Whatever gave you joy and pleasure is long forgotten.<br />
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That was a good moment in my life and it helped me start to get out of that depression. I had a glimpse of what I used to be like and how much fun I could have if only I would start to do all the things I love doing again.<br />
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So I'm back in that place of darkness where I wake up and I don't want to face the day. And I remind myself that the day is a gift when a person is feeling good. And a day is a gift when there are things in that day to look forward to.<br />
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I put those things in my day. I live with incredible sadness and incredible disappointment and a fairly large amount of fear but I have things to look forward to and I make sure of that.<br />
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What do I love to do? Always, and always and always? I love to cook. You must have seen that coming.<br />
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It always makes me happy to cook. One of the best things I do for myself is bake bread. I don't know why this is magic for me. I don't even like the bread that much! I make sourdough and it really makes me happy.<br />
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I guess because one thing about me is that I love to feed people, especially my family. I love to see them devour a loaf of bread I've made and to ask for it and to fight over it. <br />
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It's amazing to me how the bread comes together too. It takes time. It's not like most of the other things I love to cook. I like to cook dinners and lunches that are fast. That are easy to make. I abhor long and complicated recipes.<br />
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But bread needs time. <br />
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You have to feed your starter the day before you are going to make your bread. And the new recipe I'm using, which makes amazing sourdough, takes 6 to 8 hours of rising to get its flavor. So you have to measure out the ingredients carefully, on a scale and put them together and knead that dough for a while (although I use a stand mixer and a timer). And then you have to wait all day. And then you have to put that dough in a bread form and wait some more and then you have to put it in the hot oven in just the right way and keep it in there until it turns just the right color.<br />
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Is there anything better than bread? <br />
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I'm so grateful that there are these kinds of things that really make me happy and give me a little respite from all the pain I'm sitting with. <br />
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This is life. There are times when life is just a lot of pain. <br />
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We can't look outside of ourselves to others to pull us out of our own darkness. We have to be our own mother and father and give ourselves all the love we wish to receive in whatever way we can do so.<br />
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For me, it's in the kitchen and I'm so grateful that I can.Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-41970673272816043102017-11-04T22:18:00.000-07:002018-04-27T11:31:30.816-07:00The Relief of Art<div style="color: #454545; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">What hurt me - what crushed me as a young person was the ordinary - the regular world. The needs of the human body and the ways of polite society. I observed the willingness of people (and really the need) to understand and follow rules without questioning those rules.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">This hurt me because so much of what we did seemed wrong in that it was unsustainable. I’m sure it was pointed out to me in one of my classes that our world was becoming polluted and overpopulated and then one day, in another class I came to understand the inheritance of nuclear weapons, so I am probably not alone, in my generation, feeling a bit hopeless about humanity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">I was born with a contrary personality. My natural instinct is to question everything and to wonder if the opposite is true - at all times. So the more complicated and artificial the social construct, the more I have railed against it. The rules of table manners, for example confounded me. I have come to see these rules as a kind of elegance. To appreciate the rituals for the fun they can be.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">But the waste of the food industry, the enormity of it, the cycle of effort in farming translated to real garbage by way of sugar cereal or hostess snack cakes - these are the things that hurt so much. The cycle of garbage that a human produces. How can a person live, understanding the amount of trash we put onto the earth?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">The mountain of clothing that fashion demands has also irked me this whole life. I’d much rather be naked, at all times. I don’t mind about clothes. I wear them because it is required but humans aren’t meant to - every single place of work must explain in detail what kind of clothes they allow because humans continue to this day to be confounded by clothing. All the while there is clearly little more important than what a person wears in terms of how others will see you and treat you.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">But I’m not the type to become a naturalist - even though that would be the logical answer here. And I’ve met them. It should suit me. Grow what you will eat. Eat only what you can grow. Live as simply as you can. Clothing optional. Don’t drive, don’t make trash. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">In this way I’m just like every other human, I want to follow the rules and live my life. I want to play by the rules and win in my life. I work, I spend my money carefully. I keep my refrigerator stocked and my pantry full. My clothes closet overflows. I do what I can to maintain society and keep it moving forward in an orderly fashion.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21.33pt;">While it pained me in my youth to feel so crushed by the enormity of the systems set up by humans and how wrong they mostly seemed, there was a saving grace.</span><span style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21.33pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21.33pt;">There has continued to be something apart from the regular, the ordinary and horrifying. </span><span style="font-family: ".sfuidisplay"; font-size: 21.33pt;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">I found it in the books my parents had and they showed it to me in the museums we visited. It hung on the walls and stood in the halls in my grandparents house. Some people didn’t follow the rules at all, and their work was revered and held out for all to see. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">At 20 I spent a summer in Germany where things were humming along with incredible regularity. The rules were very clear and everyone followed them very carefully. I was learning about being an adult. I had to shop for myself a little, cook for myself a little. I had to manage my money and time and figure out what I would do with myself because no one was going to tell me or guide me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">I had classes and classes always made sense to me. I was good at learning and studying so that was nothing new but an entire world was open to me there. I could go anywhere I wanted after class and every weekend was free for me to explore. So I went to see art. There was a park with a Claes Oldenburg statue. There were museums filled with Dali. There was Bauhaus art everywhere.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">Even now, years since I forgot about the crush of being normal, years since I decided to do my very best to be as normal as possible (not very), I feel the relief of art. A painting, a sculpture, a drawing, a movie, a book, an artist - these are the things that let me breathe. These are things that calm me deeply. I have always wished for artistic talent because I have the mind for it. If I could draw what I dream about, for example, I think people would want to see that.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">If I could make art, that would satisfy me. I am satisfied by the art of others. In an extremely deep way, the irregularity of it - the way it is profoundly out of the ordinary gives me relief. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 21.33pt;">There is a park. It is a human place. A place where humans decided to gather, safely. A place for kids to play and for parents to watch. A place where nature is not allowed to go freely. But we also put a giant statue of a water hose there. It doesn’t do anything but look ridiculous. On a separate, curated lawn far from there lie giant shuttlecocks. Elsewhere a giant spoon with a massive cherry on it rests on top of a pond. These things crush me as well, but with gratitude. This art is real nonsense and yet it is only this kind of thing that lets me feel connected to other humans. That a human would make these things and that I am not alone in celebrating it - traveling around the world to catch glimpses of it - that is how I know there are other humans like me. That is where my hope dwells.</span></div>
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Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-34917456472464647062017-08-12T12:18:00.000-07:002017-08-12T14:15:54.506-07:00The Stupidity of All White SupremacistsI try to understand perspectives that are opposite of mine or different from mine. To do this I engage in conversations with people who are different from me and I ask lots of questions and I follow people on Twitter who are really terrifying.<br />
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But people who want a white country and preach the protection of whiteness just seem extremely stupid to me.</div>
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I've said this before: there is no such thing as white people.</div>
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Race is an imaginary idea that is used to hurt people. </div>
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I'm not suggesting that people don't have different color skin and I know that the color of your skin is of primary and persistent impact on your life experiences.</div>
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What I'm saying is that being hateful toward others is wrong and basing it on skin color is random.</div>
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The morons who gather together saying they have skin color in common do not.</div>
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They have hate in common. </div>
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Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-82367599293615380032017-07-04T10:01:00.000-07:002017-07-04T10:01:14.389-07:00Where did I go?8 months ago a truly terrible thing happened. I don't like to think about it or talk about it. If you ever read this blog and you saw my last post you know that I did not post after this terrible event and there are several reasons why.<br />
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One of the main reasons is fear. I don't know how people so openly express their feelings of horror about their own President. This doesn't seem like something anyone should do. While I understand there is freedom of speech, when it comes to this person, I don't believe that I have that freedom. <br />
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I am truly terrified of our President. What woman could claim anything else when they have heard him say that he can just grab anyone he wants by the pussy. <br />
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I was and will forever be disappointed by the women I know who voted for this man, for whatever their reason, because he admits to sexual assault proudly. I don't say that he admitted to it because his every move since saying those words has been in the same vein, the same tone. Just this week he posted a video of himself assaulting someone. He is predatory. <br />
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As it is for most people, I have grown accustomed to who the current President of the United States is and I am learning to cope with the terror and anxiety of this reality. I imagine a time when someone with dignity and respect will lead us again. I try to focus on controlling myself and the way I behave.<br />
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I missed writing and felt too afraid to write. How can I write about food with this hanging over us all?<br />
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But I'll try. And maybe I'll write about other things and leave food behind. This is my place and I can write about whatever I want. Maybe I'll even tell a story.<br />
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<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-48940248404505078522016-11-06T18:18:00.000-08:002016-11-06T18:18:14.026-08:00Masala Potatoes<div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
It has been challenging not to write all this time about the Presidential election. I have learned more about American history and politics these past months than in the previous several decades of living in the U.S. I have learned more about sexism, fear and the real problems that the people of the United States are facing. I didn't realize how upsetting it is for rural America to have to cope with the changing population and the changing morality all around them.</div>
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I got to know the U.S. population a bit better and I see how much pain so many people are in and it has inspired me to give more. I don't want my fellow Americans to be in pain.</div>
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I have often tried to engage Trump supporters to find out what he stands for that they stand for but I only get vitriol about Clinton. I genuinely do not understand why people hate Clinton. The items that are cited to me as reasons why people hate her are things I know to be false or, at worst, not a reason to hate such an experienced, dedicated and admirable person. I have yet to find reason or logic in any conversation that I have had with Trump supporters about why they are voting for him.</div>
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The closest thing to reason I have heard was something about abortion. But Trump has always been pro-choice. One person said they believe him that he has changed his position on abortion but given the frequency with which he lies that is not reasonable. I'm forced to believe that every single Trump supporter is either sexist, racist or in some other way full of hate and therefore Trump is their guy.</div>
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The best thing happened this weekend though. I was added to the secret group for people who support Clinton. No debating. No vitriol. No anger or hate. Just story after story after positive story about why we are delighted to be voting for Hillary Clinton.</div>
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If we make it through this election without turning into Idiocracy I vow to reach out to people who are struggling and do more for them. I will do my part to build bridges in this country. To forge bonds with people who are afraid so that they will instead find hope. </div>
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I don't know how to help people who want to make America white or who want women back in their place behind men or who want to dictate sexuality or what others do with their bodies. I want to know because we are all in this together. I don't ever want an election like this to happen again and I want to do my part in bridging the divides.</div>
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But for now I made masala potato dosas.</div>
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The paper dosa is my latest food obsession and I was delighted to discover I could buy the mix in my local Indian grocery store. It took me some time to master how to cook this so it would be paper-thin, crispy and delicious. But you can't serve a paper dosa as anything other than a snack and it doesn't really work as a side dish to anything not Indian that I can think of.</div>
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Thus came the task of making a filling for it so I could serve this as dinner.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCogU9xhlycCc1FsN41rJifsYsssvONTt78Sqqydu0V1lXCKPLIXh2mDqHW07CHK2x_WgoS4QHnX5uge9jk-Wp6abeFV_sTSMRoADLGViPpWGh_V4x-0LdtTRPDQ_COoAQtm7s8rDPFA/s640/blogger-image-892146145.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCogU9xhlycCc1FsN41rJifsYsssvONTt78Sqqydu0V1lXCKPLIXh2mDqHW07CHK2x_WgoS4QHnX5uge9jk-Wp6abeFV_sTSMRoADLGViPpWGh_V4x-0LdtTRPDQ_COoAQtm7s8rDPFA/s640/blogger-image-892146145.jpg" /></a></div>
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The problem I've always had trying to cook Indian food is that I don't have the spices in my kitchen. There are a lot of spices involved in cooking any Indian dish. This one required things like mustard seeds, cumin seeds, curry leaves, urad dal and asafoetida. Wait, what?</div>
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Yeah, I looked in a couple of grocery stores and they don't carry those things. Of course the Indian grocery store carries all of it but it took courage to go in there with my shopping list and buy these things. Especially asafoetida. That is literally not even food. But it has a really strong flavor. It is the flavor of Indian food! I loved the feedback I got while cooking this. It smelled amazing!</div>
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I bought the spices a month ago and the potatoes and red onion a couple of weeks ago and today I finally decided to pull the trigger and get out all these different spices I've never used before and try a combination of recipes to come up with my masala potato filling.</div>
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It was damn good and completely easy to make. Yay! Score! Adding this hardcore dinner to the rotation. The kids loved it!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0dLFe6-nMGjV_uR_lnPkDJP-Pd-isnnvysLvr8IV0UYxpoAuq4_5ywSweUqZXEzP-kEjUDjHrKwCCKBj86wJuO6GgqoAzZQXPTvlSg3iLBflm8-PWn-mKB5mb1TVkq-K_6YAaOLqvuQ/s640/blogger-image-596499742.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0dLFe6-nMGjV_uR_lnPkDJP-Pd-isnnvysLvr8IV0UYxpoAuq4_5ywSweUqZXEzP-kEjUDjHrKwCCKBj86wJuO6GgqoAzZQXPTvlSg3iLBflm8-PWn-mKB5mb1TVkq-K_6YAaOLqvuQ/s640/blogger-image-596499742.jpg" /></a></div>
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Thank you to the Chennai Club for introducing me to this deliciousness!</div>
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<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-53862104744896916762016-08-05T12:54:00.003-07:002016-08-05T12:54:58.412-07:00The CruiseOften when I describe the 7 of us to people for the first time I say we are a Brady Bunch family. How young do you have to be to have never heard of the Brady Bunch? I'll have to keep that in mind. We are blended. Two kids each from our first marriages and one from this one. A boy on each end and three girls in the middle. Kids either 1 or 2 years apart in age ... until Jacob. He is 6 years younger than his youngest sister, 11 years younger than his brother. <br />
<br />
Last summer was difficult to put it mildly. Everyone seemed to be either at a difficult age or at least a difficult combination of ages so that time with all five kids was nearly unbearable. We are not a family of 7 all the time or even half the time but we are together most of the summer and every winter break. Last year, as summer approached, I changed my work to part-time to help face this change. We travel to Kansas to have extra adult support to cope with all the kids. I am happy to say that, for now, we finally got the hang of it. But last summer was different.<br />
<br />
As we muddled through our time with all five kids, I imagined the next time we would have them all in December and I booked a cruise.<br />
<br />
Carnival was the cheapest cruise line and the only one with childcare for kids under 3. They have a fairly bad reputation, so with low expectations, I booked the Carnival Miracle for a 7 night cruise to Mexico from Los Angeles. The thought of this cruise got me through every day for the four months leading up to it.<br />
<br />
No matter what the cruise was like, I knew for certain that each one of the kids would love it beyond anything they had ever experienced. <br />
<br />
As an adult, I'd rather vacation in almost any other way than a cruise. Even my son, who was 13 at the time, was able to identify the moral problems with taking a cruise. Isn't this terrible for the oceans and the environment in multiple ways? Isn't this just wasting an excess of money that we could have given to charity? Isn't this just a waste of food and a series of incredible indulgences? What are we doing in Mexico where everyone is so poor compared to us? Couldn't we come down here and use this much money to really help a lot of people? He had a blast on the cruise but asked that we never do such a thing again because it's just so blatantly wrong.<br />
<br />
I booked the cruise because I knew this would be the perfect thing to do with all our kids to avoid having 5 people asking me for something all at once all day long every day for a week. <br />
<br />
I hope that most parents reading that are shaking their head and thinking, "um, why don't you just teach your kids not to do that?" Yes, we finally figured that out. It took us 4 1/2 years. <br />
<br />
We finally figured out that we can make rules like:<br />
You may not ask us a question a second time after we have been answered or you will get a consequence. <br />
Don't ask us when a meal is or what a meal is. We will feed you enough every day.<br />
Don't ask the other parent what you have already asked one parent.<br />
Don't interrupt a conversation to ask a question.<br />
Help clean up after meals.<br />
Get yourself a healthy breakfast every morning when you wake up.<br />
<br />
Etc. We have a list and there are consequences for not following the rules. Yes, we finally figured out parenting (by the time our oldest was 14).<br />
<br />
Anyway, back to the cruise. <br />
<br />
No cooking for a week. No cleaning for a week. No asking the kids to do anything for a week. Just the seven of us, on a boat where we could each eat what we wanted all day long, all night long and do anything we wanted on a little safe space.<br />
<br />
Cruise basics: 24 hours a day you can eat something. 24 hours a day you can order free room service. On this cruise there was always pizza, burgers, fries, nachos and ice cream. At meal times there was a lot of other food choices. Another cruise basic: you can't get lost on a cruise. The ship may be big but there are always one of 5 or 6 places that a person will likely be at any given time and that's if you have had zero communication. There is always an activity happening on a cruise. And there is always a movie playing on your tv.<br />
<br />
By day 3, the pizza place knew our girls and exactly what they would order for breakfast, mid-morning snack and a few other times throughout the day. I think they were sick of the pizza by day 4.<br />
<br />
They could not actually grasp the fact that they didn't have to ask us before getting themselves as much ice cream as they wanted. Or any other dessert.<br />
<br />
I don't know if the kids ate any vegetables or fruits during that week. I'm pretty sure they did because one day there was fondue. There was a lot of fruit dipped in chocolate that day.<br />
<br />
The plan for the cruise was for my husband and I to have time together. No work, no work phone, no computer. Just the two of us enjoying a lot of meals and entertainment and spending time with kids if they were being nice or letting them hang out in kids club if they were not.<br />
<br />
We spent most of our time with the kids. <br />
<br />
I think everyone's favorite activity was going to the fancy dinners, ordering whatever they wanted without fear that they wouldn't like it, knowing they could go to the buffet after if it didn't work out. <br />
<br />
It was really just about the most fun we have ever had all together.<br />
<br />
We had pretty good weather but didn't spend too much time in the pools. We loved all the shows. The comedy club was fantastic.<br />
<br />
One night after dinner we were so exhausted that we told the four big kids to go to the family show while we put Jacob to bed. We told them we would meet them there shortly. We lay down on our bed, fully dressed to have a short nap. When we woke up it was 1 in the morning. In a panic, we ran next door and found all four kids sound asleep. The next day we discovered that they had waited a short while before heading to the front row where they watched the family show and stayed for two 18-and-up shows until our oldest made them go to bed because he didn't want to stay up anymore. I'm fairly sure that was their favorite night.<br />
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<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-62036572714265450292016-07-13T21:19:00.003-07:002016-07-17T19:28:54.816-07:00Black Lives MatterI'll begin at the end. <br />
<br />
We must stop identifying each other by the color of our skin.<br />
<br />
<table>
<tbody>
<tr>
<td><div>
This is the color white</div>
</td><td><div style="border: 1px solid #000; height: 50px; width: 50px;">
</div>
</td><td>This is the color black</td><td><div style="background-color: black; border: 1px solid #000; color: black; height: 50px; width: 50px;">
</div>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<span style="background-color: white;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">People do not have white colored skin and people do not have black colored skin. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">So let's agree that these words are factually wrong and let's stop using them.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">You can't have a thought without words. Words create your thoughts and therefore the reality that you experience.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">Since I was taught from birth to identify people as different races, I see people with a different shade of skin from mine as other. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">I can't stop this. I can't erase the words that are in my vocabulary and that I think when I encounter people. These words inform me about who is not like me, who is not in my group.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">But I can change this for the future. When I had children I decided never to use skin color or "race" to describe people. They never heard people described by the color of their skin until they went to school. I saw proof of how profoundly the absence of racist language impacted the way a child sees the world, time and again. I saw my kids describe people by their clothes, hairstyle or actions but never by the color of their skin because this was never modeled for them and they had no language to do it.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">Don't let people identify you by the tint of your flesh. Don't answer people who ask you to identify yourself by race. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">No one wants to be identified by their physical characteristics. I don't want to be talked about as the "short American." I don't like blonde jokes. I don't want to be labeled and categorized by the way I look. I hear someone described on the radio as an "African-American" man and I think of someone describing me as frizzy-haired, Jewish-American woman. No! It's preposterous. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: white;">Words have power. Use your language carefully. Do not perpetuate racism by speaking its language. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white;">The Black Lives Matter movement is waking people up because this phrase inadvertently conjures how wrong it is </span><span style="background-color: white;">call people white or black. And it reminds us all how wrong it is for people to feel afraid because of the way they look. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">If you don't like the idea that black lives matter please read <u>Between the World and Me</u>. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">Or, if you don't want to read a book, just think about this. If you don't understand why there is a Black Lives Matter movement, then the answer is to try to understand. Look into it. Find out what is going on. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">Recognize that you have never needed to cry out to the world around you to proclaim that your life matters. Unless someone has beat you and abused you. And then maybe you had to find a voice to say that your life matters. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">There are people in the United States who have suffered here for hundreds of years and they still suffer because they are seen as "black." This is what Black Lives Matter means. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: white;">What I love most about the United States is the freedom we have. We have innumerable diverse cultures and communities and we are tremendously different from one another. Here we are free to be as we are. We enjoy all the flavors of the cultures we have in this great nation. We have freedom but we struggle to have equality.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">The path to ending racism is quiet and subtle. We change our thoughts by changing our words.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">We have to listen to each other and hear when someone is hurting and be honest about why. We have to hear people when they say black lives matter. It isn't random or hateful or racist. It's a pained cry for equality and for an end to abuse and each of us must answer this cry by seeking to understand it and then saying yes black lives do matter and we have to mean it.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">We must also stop labeling ourselves by the shades of our hides and we must reject the idea that our body informs which group we belong to. </span>
<br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;">We can do this quietly with our own speech and our own individual commitment to end the use of language that creates racist thought.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-6879514768257227662016-05-27T22:45:00.001-07:002016-05-27T22:45:16.234-07:00Zombie Apocalypse Horse CakeA few weeks ago I found an excellent book at the middle school book fair. It's called Cake My Day.<div><br></div><div>I bought it because my son was going to turn 3 and I saw directions in this book on how to make a horse cake. I also thought there were a lot of neat recipes in here so I got it.</div><div><br></div><div>Right from the start I knew I could have an entire years worth of blog entries showing my cake fails if I attempted the recipes in this book. In fact, the first thing I did after picking out all my favorite recipes was to scour the Internet for cake fail pictures from attempts to recreate the impossible cakes in this book.</div><div><br></div><div>I figured the horse cake would be doable even though I planned to alter the horse.</div><div><br></div><div>I took this idea:</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqSNMTA2NjpYYwiL4lsIdobSSd8_pqHSguQ1WbCSeQLM9aXINsBrttuUZEcI7SpVjmtdKT-UqNawdCC-6Who3PlKQsGMOyL6J8dlnLvCEZ1RaJNqnODzyjqx_jp2AMRIYPmgs2w_PanQ/s640/blogger-image-730847999.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqSNMTA2NjpYYwiL4lsIdobSSd8_pqHSguQ1WbCSeQLM9aXINsBrttuUZEcI7SpVjmtdKT-UqNawdCC-6Who3PlKQsGMOyL6J8dlnLvCEZ1RaJNqnODzyjqx_jp2AMRIYPmgs2w_PanQ/s640/blogger-image-730847999.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I thought I'd simply frost it and make a brown horse.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">This was a great idea on my part. There was no reason this would not work. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">But when I assembled my cake it looked so disturbing that I felt it more resembled a zombie horse than a regular one.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkQwmz2QbOPpCSGX89P-8tTw116b9bgRpzYKvvyz-vrCx-C5nsFl1xqhrLuWDP9VhcIMiMZVpwc95C1wU67XYKI3AmI5Hng87UvEqj3u8F42pUdqkVcD8mDNe3t54ljPP2Uo7mfC-SkQ/s640/blogger-image-2144505297.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkQwmz2QbOPpCSGX89P-8tTw116b9bgRpzYKvvyz-vrCx-C5nsFl1xqhrLuWDP9VhcIMiMZVpwc95C1wU67XYKI3AmI5Hng87UvEqj3u8F42pUdqkVcD8mDNe3t54ljPP2Uo7mfC-SkQ/s640/blogger-image-2144505297.jpg"></a></div>The side you can't see has a big chunk missing from the side of its face.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">The best thing about my kids is that they are always totally impressed by my efforts to make them cakes. This was my biggest cake fail yet but my son loves it so much. He was so happy with it.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">He thought it was odd that I let him take the front off and eat it along with an eye and an ear. I don't think he even had a bite of the cake after that.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">My husband went for one of the Oreo stack legs and nearly toppled the entire beast.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I don't know why but my favorite part of the specialty cake process is destroying it after it's done. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">In any case, I think I get what's happening in this book now with the shapes and whatnot and I'd like to try again.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Not with the horse cake though. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Unless I decide to attempt every cake in this book. It would provide a lot of laughs. </div><br></div><div>More cakes to come in a month...</div>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-78273128493739218142016-02-19T22:39:00.000-08:002016-02-20T05:27:49.136-08:00Taking a Very Genki Two Year Old to JapanI have so many blogs to post! More fun vending machine stuff, aquariums in Tokyo, different food experiences we had... but I wanted to get out my thoughts on taking our very, very active son to Tokyo.<br />
<br />
He will be 3 in a few months so he isn't a young two-year old. He is the kind of little one who wants to do everything for himself even though he can't. He will not sit in a stroller unless he is about to pass out from walking for miles. He is too heavy to carry. He loves yelling and screaming instead of talking in a normal tone of voice. He will run into traffic or in front of a train if he is not physically restrained at all times.<br />
<br />
Before we came to Japan I was very lucky to find so many helpful tips on what to do with him while here. I even found an amazing babysitter who was able to come in the evenings and many afternoons so that I could work, get breaks and have time alone with my husband, who was working around the clock for the most part.<br />
<br />
First, let me tell you what I had planned for us to do in the two weeks. Mostly it was do something in the morning and let Jacob nap in the afternoon or if I had a babysitter, take him somewhere in the morning and go somewhere alone in the afternoon and then fun dinners at night.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="10" style="width: 100%;" valign="top">
<tbody>
<tr valign="top">
<td>Mon<br />
Pintokana Sushi<br />
Lego Brick Park<br />
Tokyo Tower<br />
Teppanyaki ten<br />
<br /></td><td>Tues<br />
Home visit lunch<br />
Shinagawa aquarium<br />
<br />
<br /></td><td>Wed<br />
Cup Noodles museum<br />
Anpanman museum<br />
Home visit for lunch<br />
Hakkeijima aquarium</td><td>Thurs<br />
National Children's castle<br />
Department stores<br />
<br />
<br /></td><td>Fri<br />
Tokyo Station</td><td>Sat<br />
Kamakura<br />
Home visit for dinner</td><td>Sun<br />
Daikanyama</td>
</tr>
<tr valign="top">
<td>Mon<br />
Museum of Science and History<br />
<br /></td><td>Tues<br />
Tokyo Fire Museum<br />
Takeshimaya dept store<br />
<br /></td><td>Wed<br />
Ueno Zoo<br />
Shinjuku station department stores</td><td>Thurs<br />
Tokyo Dome<br />
Asobono</td><td>Fri<br />
Niko Niko park<br />
Tokyo Sea Life Park<br />
<br /></td><td>Sat<br />
Ghibli Museum</td><td><br /></td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
But guess what? It is very hard to do anything with some toddlers. Amazingly, we did a lot of the things I planned but we also did not do many of those things. For example, I didn't even visit one department store! <br />
<br />
Let me describe what it was like to take our very active toddler to Tokyo.<br />
<br />
First there was jet lag which meant he was up at 3:45 for 4:45 for the first couple of days. Boy is it hard to start your day that early! Even once he was over jet lag and getting up at a normal time in the morning, at least an hour was spent trying to convince him to get dressed. <br />
<br />
Once dressed I would get out the door with him and start our day which involved either getting in a taxi or getting on a number of trains.<br />
<br />
I like taking the trains in Japan but it is excruciating with a small child who will not listen. First there is the screaming when you want to hold his hand so he doesn't jump onto the tracks. Then there is the throwing himself on the ground. There is the laying on the ground and rolling around. <br />
<br />
It got especially crazy on the trains because he wanted to stand on the seats or run around in the cars or even roll around on the filthy floor. He was always covered in filth by the end of our train trips. <br />
<br />
Taxi rides were easier but he often refused to be buckled in and wanted to run around the back of the cab so a lot of our outings were spent with me trying to find ways to physically restrain him while he screamed and tried to kick, hit and bite me.<br />
<br />
Toward the end of our trip he took to licking everything. He wanted to lick the glass as he rode up the escalators. He wanted to lick the posts in the road. He wanted to lick us.<br />
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I think it might be an understatement to say this travel was very hard on the boy. I found that days when we did nothing more than go to the park by our hotel, have a quick lunch and a nap were easiest on him. <br />
<br />
As much as I wanted to show him different stuff for little kids, traveling around was hard on him and he took it out on everyone around him.<br />
<br />
If I knew of some way to put him in a pre-school environment every day I'm certain that would have been the best thing for him because he would have had friends, toys and a regular schedule. <br />
<br />
So if you have to travel to Tokyo with a toddler, do <u>get a babysitter</u> or set your child up with some kind of daycare situation so he can have a simple daily experience with toys and playing to counteract the total unfamiliarity of a new language and a foreign place.<br />
<br />
If you have to be with your toddler the whole time, plan to take a nap in the afternoon with him. You will need it. <br />
<br />
Either way, plan to go to bed early every night. You will need your strength!<br />
<br />
If your child will use a stroller, bring a stroller!! I would have loved to have one - it would have made our entire trip different because there was a great deal we could have walked to but the few times I tried to walk around with him were entirely spent trying to keep him from getting run over which meant having to carry him kicking and screaming.<br />
<br />
Also, and I read this beforehand but didn't really listen, <u>bring snacks from home</u>. Our boy will eat anything so I didn't think food would be an issue and sure enough he loved the food in Tokyo but he was homesick for everything and could only express that by saying over and over the list of people he missed and asking for goldfish crackers. I should have brought goldfish crackers. I did bring a huge bag of cheerioes and he ate them every day until they were gone. On the other hand, we found some fun Japanese snacks that he loves and that might not have happened if I'd brought a bunch of goldfish crackers.<br />
<br />
I found great babysitters through the Tokyo Mother's Group - <a href="http://www.tokyomothersgroup.com/apps/auth/signup">http://www.tokyomothersgroup.com/apps/auth/signup</a><br />
<br />
And I loved meeting wonderful people through Nagomi visit <a href="http://www.nagomivisit.com/">http://www.nagomivisit.com</a>/ and The Global Families <a href="http://www.theglobalfamilies.com/">http://www.theglobalfamilies.com/</a><br />
<br />
Nagomi visit lets you sign up to eat lunch or dinner in someone's house. You say where and when and people apply to host you. We did that three times and each experience was really wonderful. However it isn't for the faint of heart. It was so challenging to bring our son to people's homes since he basically tried to destroy everything and beat up their kids and steal their kids' toys. It was unbelievably stressful and embarrassing but the people who hosted us were so nice and I'm so happy we did that. It would be great to do with older kids for sure.<br />
<br />
The Global Families might be a better option because you just meet up with people but I liked doing both things and would do both again.<br />
<br />
I'd love to hear other people's stories about traveling internationally with a toddler. I guess I should start interviewing people. The pictures alone would make a hilarious book.<br />
<br />
Here are some of Jacob's "I just can't" pictures, but I didn't get the most exciting ones of him licking things or kicking me or beating up other little kids. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCrzvW2131QJrLZ5tDSOELD7jDrSdBVsPTaL70GxduQxIStJrA65rz6p17I8tM1vivAdnGO33mR3jdK4zBogQQqkWwaYvoVTHC78w0cB3F8k8N9d-S3p-V0gljHuDCdZKCk0uBSow6Hw/s1600/IMG_0858.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCrzvW2131QJrLZ5tDSOELD7jDrSdBVsPTaL70GxduQxIStJrA65rz6p17I8tM1vivAdnGO33mR3jdK4zBogQQqkWwaYvoVTHC78w0cB3F8k8N9d-S3p-V0gljHuDCdZKCk0uBSow6Hw/s320/IMG_0858.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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You can't exactly tell that hundreds of people are going by in Shinagawa station where Jacob just parked it.</div>
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One of the escalators he surely licked.</div>
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A very crowded train with no room - he is sitting on my feet.</div>
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I briefly pondered what would happen if I just got off the train...</div>
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Licking the floor of train.</div>
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I realize these pictures don't even come close to capturing the screaming and chaos and exhaustion that toddler wrangling is...<br />
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<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JtckptFkCaU/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/JtckptFkCaU?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
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<br />Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-6933152590550337572016-02-13T16:36:00.001-08:002016-02-13T16:36:29.250-08:00Vending Machines<div><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">Someone please tell me why we don't have vending machines everywhere in the U.S.? And more importantly, why don't we have awesome ones?</span></div><div>I want to get ice cream out of a vending machine on Main Street in Half Moon Bay, 24/7.<br><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjb2ij7VH_izg9FySFEDy9CP9NmbyUKL4OAzyL1etT4w1cRG6nFCrLmqhWKI8hMtR7Xqoqo_9UBl9L7u9x2L4gn-H3TayxXid47JSkjEvQuwmZKUgsWYQbRS4yWI-X2I65KyO6qiOfcUg/s640/blogger-image-1553508064.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjb2ij7VH_izg9FySFEDy9CP9NmbyUKL4OAzyL1etT4w1cRG6nFCrLmqhWKI8hMtR7Xqoqo_9UBl9L7u9x2L4gn-H3TayxXid47JSkjEvQuwmZKUgsWYQbRS4yWI-X2I65KyO6qiOfcUg/s640/blogger-image-1553508064.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I'll admit this is an uncommon one, but if it can be done I want it in my town. French fries, hot dogs, yaki onigiri...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9n9Uop1nQNOBG9rlc1YkTVIKYUNsG2Yn94eZ3Rv7K7rUcjiiOvZ8hZet9d5NWcVUeysww7KF6_YxKuDw27MTWTpLiBgVS35DhpOI_AC6a6bJoWtl1f-vKqeT2MNqBgx-rdRdhR_HZtg/s640/blogger-image--1990076575.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9n9Uop1nQNOBG9rlc1YkTVIKYUNsG2Yn94eZ3Rv7K7rUcjiiOvZ8hZet9d5NWcVUeysww7KF6_YxKuDw27MTWTpLiBgVS35DhpOI_AC6a6bJoWtl1f-vKqeT2MNqBgx-rdRdhR_HZtg/s640/blogger-image--1990076575.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8KvstNso3El6p8LTcUfAILsfPRNWAdygzym1o38elUg1A7Bxw9hPZuldZVtg_TW1GxTmk46ZQyB7jS0R1jWl_MQBY8SQSvNVEYrkmuxbgjMOvkYI6piVeqL7hyphenhyphenFMvbwsLI3bHl8J9rw/s640/blogger-image-857485990.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8KvstNso3El6p8LTcUfAILsfPRNWAdygzym1o38elUg1A7Bxw9hPZuldZVtg_TW1GxTmk46ZQyB7jS0R1jWl_MQBY8SQSvNVEYrkmuxbgjMOvkYI6piVeqL7hyphenhyphenFMvbwsLI3bHl8J9rw/s640/blogger-image-857485990.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJH1rwnMjJssw2ZXzw7MplcOcguhSIG4zV8tXLjO-EePK7TQWgY7PalsbSHkU-oq_AiRWv4a4vg4qWRwJQYI08w03rCaC71YLdkH6r30Rn1YWiB2dbW2J9IJKzmqu_EDLc2HAxwJ7d3w/s640/blogger-image-375625371.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJH1rwnMjJssw2ZXzw7MplcOcguhSIG4zV8tXLjO-EePK7TQWgY7PalsbSHkU-oq_AiRWv4a4vg4qWRwJQYI08w03rCaC71YLdkH6r30Rn1YWiB2dbW2J9IJKzmqu_EDLc2HAxwJ7d3w/s640/blogger-image-375625371.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I really just want 20 vending machines lined up in a row.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUlMPGIupl5aFhDzan2OpgRI1W3hT2_o9IuFfTs-eddaiNeY2PYLkgE2P8KEYcM-gJTQIL3Y5GulG6T5VYO4Rl9eJhlfwVo0jNtgCe24YKq-U_zrkNAR7zwOr_2cDzcq2yOoVnMcHd4Q/s640/blogger-image--2044661637.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUlMPGIupl5aFhDzan2OpgRI1W3hT2_o9IuFfTs-eddaiNeY2PYLkgE2P8KEYcM-gJTQIL3Y5GulG6T5VYO4Rl9eJhlfwVo0jNtgCe24YKq-U_zrkNAR7zwOr_2cDzcq2yOoVnMcHd4Q/s640/blogger-image--2044661637.jpg"></a></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Some people want to get a waffle from a vending machine.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOCzcBbqnZ9rjDtKn9sjKZSIoGN0xpP6Y3n9RGyVe1GriHrbfFwxjkrv6yvtcOnCX2EUwVT7D3y8dZid4BZ9F8zXyo-66c_iCxUYr4xFsVNTGWmhp_YG0FU7m8-RpBJtRWwg2RG95zug/s640/blogger-image-2117736846.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOCzcBbqnZ9rjDtKn9sjKZSIoGN0xpP6Y3n9RGyVe1GriHrbfFwxjkrv6yvtcOnCX2EUwVT7D3y8dZid4BZ9F8zXyo-66c_iCxUYr4xFsVNTGWmhp_YG0FU7m8-RpBJtRWwg2RG95zug/s640/blogger-image-2117736846.jpg"></a></div></div>To be perfectly honest, I have a dream to open a space on Main Street in Half Moon Bay with a bunch of Japanese vending machines. I actually think it's possible to execute this dream soon but I'm a little embarrassed - what kind of dream is that?</div></div><div><br></div><div>Let's just say, if you have this dream too or you want this, please let me know!</div>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-33206916353925527292016-02-10T00:00:00.001-08:002016-02-10T00:00:01.274-08:00JapanWhere do I start? <div>I guess here:</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOyzQYpFksGzT_qoexAruitJAOhoIz9Xjorb7_mZjWXL68nyLFqCRmuXbzI0V1-2MOAnQiE1VOReYmHNHRyxa_fuZyvegDMeZORvfZO0srQtQtiTGm2Zj8qIkzv81ixNIoRc0HiYCSFg/s640/blogger-image--191309512.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOyzQYpFksGzT_qoexAruitJAOhoIz9Xjorb7_mZjWXL68nyLFqCRmuXbzI0V1-2MOAnQiE1VOReYmHNHRyxa_fuZyvegDMeZORvfZO0srQtQtiTGm2Zj8qIkzv81ixNIoRc0HiYCSFg/s640/blogger-image--191309512.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I have known since 1995 that the future is in Japan but some things are just not catching on in the U.S. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I need a Japanese toilet.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIS3Li-ixvCNU5VbXQunueB2FRo_A2sVWAg28k7vqz6jB2zMfnbjx2_qUnST1ub5bFHmoTMNrLDn1Gfg5ZRmPvC5Jg53vSNflZJ122_cys483dNsD1-gjXX5BL-CsymKNic89VftkKtg/s640/blogger-image-189820210.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIS3Li-ixvCNU5VbXQunueB2FRo_A2sVWAg28k7vqz6jB2zMfnbjx2_qUnST1ub5bFHmoTMNrLDn1Gfg5ZRmPvC5Jg53vSNflZJ122_cys483dNsD1-gjXX5BL-CsymKNic89VftkKtg/s640/blogger-image-189820210.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2sMDeYPyyNqGD4bTpLMJ71kbRMSDRIdESJf9lsN9p_FMFhZ8Jm5C_6MVLrm7V_ZaQqD9xIhjVs2rZuDyGKiUqYrhTbMojjOYubz3UQW0NSRVF5Lg3woQM1_4ZMdf9MAj28BOpQIBR1w/s640/blogger-image-349811107.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2sMDeYPyyNqGD4bTpLMJ71kbRMSDRIdESJf9lsN9p_FMFhZ8Jm5C_6MVLrm7V_ZaQqD9xIhjVs2rZuDyGKiUqYrhTbMojjOYubz3UQW0NSRVF5Lg3woQM1_4ZMdf9MAj28BOpQIBR1w/s640/blogger-image-349811107.jpg"></a></div><br></div>And this thing to clean the toilet before I sit on it in McDonalds.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpyggYJ5X61b6Rr_CmgYHBxWCoFKXE7MPNL_i3-Td113rvPBXWXXg235CPtGP5O2Uj9nxU3liNiJttgmXkn1Wv6DmjTWcTTp9AJXmXUoy7jV0c_o3IBtuvlaH262dIOuXTxMz4Njdf9w/s640/blogger-image--482023078.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpyggYJ5X61b6Rr_CmgYHBxWCoFKXE7MPNL_i3-Td113rvPBXWXXg235CPtGP5O2Uj9nxU3liNiJttgmXkn1Wv6DmjTWcTTp9AJXmXUoy7jV0c_o3IBtuvlaH262dIOuXTxMz4Njdf9w/s640/blogger-image--482023078.jpg"></a></div>This toilet magically opens when I walk in the room.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpFc6yyyXwRyEk8_Hdgf0e2vU0X8f8PLZ3jsZlFUNbO4l7q0QoUe6mPwhmcTQSfZZu_wzTqclrENzzqpD8Ym4CRpvpQIDBpw4uAfMu2195O9Gl_jsRJmMNguYUO39CBHopT97PMqvyqw/s640/blogger-image--1004440777.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpFc6yyyXwRyEk8_Hdgf0e2vU0X8f8PLZ3jsZlFUNbO4l7q0QoUe6mPwhmcTQSfZZu_wzTqclrENzzqpD8Ym4CRpvpQIDBpw4uAfMu2195O9Gl_jsRJmMNguYUO39CBHopT97PMqvyqw/s640/blogger-image--1004440777.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I need a toilet seat that is warm and I like a toilet that makes pleasant loud noises like a waterfall or plays music while I use it.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">What the heck America? Get with it on the toilets!</div><br></div><br></div>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-48276484344101949082016-02-05T11:15:00.001-08:002016-04-21T06:40:46.093-07:00Japan - the beginning of blogging8 and 1/2 years ago I went to Japan and blogged about it <a href="http://nemiccolo.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">here</a>. Since then I have sometimes blogged a lot and lately blogged very little. I will be honest ; there are things I want to blog about but I just can't. <br />
<br />
However, I'm going to try do some serious sharing over the next couple of weeks. Let's see if I can do it!<br />
<br />
Here we go!Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2206295836968776209.post-48238248517720613602015-12-11T09:58:00.001-08:002015-12-11T09:58:47.186-08:00NachasI'm so proud today. My 6th grader worked really hard and made principal's honor roll. And it's not just that. My 8th grader has done this more quarters than not since he started middle school but honestly it's hard to really understand this until you go to an assembly and realize that not every kid manages this.<div><br></div><div>I was so proud of my little girl that I cried because these kids are so motivated to excel in school and they do this all on their own.</div><div><br></div><div>Yes, I have helped them study for tests when they ask me to quiz them but that is very rare. Since they started school at 5 years old I have barely asked them if they had homework. School is theirs and they own it like champs.</div><div><br></div><div>These children want to succeed, they are willing to work hard and I haven't pushed that on them. I hope it's something I modeled but their will to do well is internal.</div><div><br></div><div>I am proud of them and in awe. I remember getting pretty unremarkable grades in middle school. In fact, if I reflect on life when I was that age it's like I grew up in Olden Times compared to my children.</div><div><br></div><div>They know more about everything, have been all over the world and are just all around incredible people. I am in awe of them and what they do in life.</div><div><br></div><div>Last spring Marshal and I were staying in a hotel with all five kids and I remember there was a moment when we checked in kind of late in the evening and the kids were all being wild and we herded them into the elevator. We looked exhausted and stressed to the hilt. The kids were all being their individual versions of weird and Jacob was screeching. We felt terrible for the man on the elevator with us. But he looked at us and said, 'you are wealthy.'</div><div><br></div><div>It was a little bit upsetting to hear just then. We felt overwhelmed and unhappy and then ungrateful and ashamed but lately I really understand his comment.</div><div><br></div><div>I am wealthy because of these five kids I get to raise. They are gems. They are riches. They are vast and untold wealth. I am counting the days until I get all five of them again. I really can't wait and I will enjoy, savor every moment. I will give my full attention to each one and hear them and see them. For seven days, with nothing to interrupt, I'll enjoy my real wealth!</div>Amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15700594008546448845noreply@blogger.com1